My DS is an incredible kid. He is a straight A student but not a dork. He does well socially and so far doesn't seem to be dabbling in any questionable behaviors. Puberty has begun in earnest in the past few months and I can see many changes looming. My children have a reputation as being "painless" - people enjoy being with them. That is a wonderful thing to hear from other people.
The thing I worry about is that in nurturing my very broken ex-H, excusing his behaviors and trying to keep peace in a very bad sitch I engendered too much feeling of responsibilty for others emotions in DS. My mantra at that time was "Ok DS, we need to be quiet because Daddy is studying for medical boards...", "Ok DS, Daddy doesn't feel good today (too grumpy, anxious, depressed or angry) so lets keep the house extra clean and be extra quiet...." Current H is MUCH more mentally healthy than ex-H and the current environment is much more conducive to DS understanding that H's feelings are H's feelings, we didn't cause them but we love him and we will try to help where we can.
