Hi Karen Well, I would only encourage you to lower your expectations if that is also going to follow with lowering your resmentments. It doesn't sound like you really want to, or are able to, do that at this time. You and your H have LOTS of drama going on in that household. wow. You clearly are both very emotional people which can be good but also can clash. And now both of you are both depressed to boot. Recipe for big trouble. The problem I see with some M's and not having an "escape hatch" is that often instead of making the couple work harder to make the M thrive, it does the opposite. The couple knows neither person is going anywhere so they really retreat into their own worlds, never really work on their own issues, to make the M better. Too much effort maybe. So it's a double-edged sword. But ultimately, we know there is always an escape hatch, if not for you, than maybe your S. I'd try and figure out what is going on in HIS head for a while and stop making assumptions about what he is thinking. Just my 2 cents.
