He KNOWS his drinking is very destructive and what its doing to the marriage. I just dont know anymore what its going to take to jolt him. I mean gosh the EA was a huge jolt, me leaving was a jolt, me going to file was a jolt, our seperation was a jolt.... I am just feeling like there is just nothing big enough to get him to change permanently.
yes the financial situation is absolutley rediculous!!! He dosnt listen to me. when he works the overtime he easily makes in the upper 80's but when he dosnt he only makes 60 a year as his base... and we still cant seem to manage on that and no he dosnt listen to me at all financially and I do know how to manage and budget money.
he just buys whatever he wants, like the Harely, that was 21000, and we have a truck and van payment, a family of 5. I just feel he is totally irresponsible. Not thinking of the kids or the family. Just doing whatever and I am so tired of trying to help him or make him feel better about himself and security... he dosnt give me much!
He does hug me a lot and is very affectionate, tells me constantly how beautiful I am and how very much he loves me. Thats all nice, but it dosnt take care of the problems. He also gives me a lot of grief. I have no security, well hell who wants the security of being married to an unstable unpredictable unreliable person? okay so he says a lot, and what does he show me. This is never ending Chris, how long have we been talking about this cycle, of he screws up, I get highly upset, he changes long enough to keep me here then goes back...
rewarding good behavior dosnt keep him on track... he is just going to do whatever no matter what.
could you look at Argus's thread in I need suport? he needs suport and advice and I just dont seem to have any right now, I am feeling burnt out on this whole thing.
I am not saying I am leaving today. but I am preparing myself to be able to leave so hey he has some time to change his ways.
I am also tired of him complaining I dont share myself enough with him and I do but he just assumes I am full of it. so how do you deal with that... I just dont know anymore.
