{{{heatherg}}} I'm getting fed up with your H. At some point, not forgiving someone for something they did months or years ago turns from "principle" into "grudge." Okay, H, you made your point, now scoot over and make room on the bed. Or, if you'd prefer, let's divide it...and I don't mean with a chain saw (although, the thought is somewhat entertaining). Let's divide it along with everything else, because it's a marital asset.
And WTF is he doing sitting on YOUR couch? Why not tell him you're not comfortable with him sitting there?
I'm obviously getting p!ssed about your sitch, where I have no business getting p!ssed. I'm somewhat sensitive over that imaginary line that gets crossed when forgiveness is withheld for justifiable reasons, to where it is withheld because the withholder wants to cause pain, or chooses not to grow.
My W can hold a grudge. She still does against her dad for stuff he said/did to her when she was a kid. And she still does against me for stuff I did long ago.
When lack of forgiveness becomes another weapon in their arsenal, there will be no peace in the marriage.
Frankly, Heather, maybe you need to be talking to a lawyer.
