Chris, thats like me when I say I am going to keep this short, it still ends up long
I know what you mean about the runs, thats when I did my best thinking I dont know why that is. Yep and when weight training I am too concentrated on what I am doing to be doing any phylosophising or reflecting.
the thing with the online time. The reason I dont want to give him planned schedule is because he will get mad at me if I stray from it and call me a liar for going on line during a time I said I wouldnt be and I dont want to be that rigidly tied to a schedule. I think its fine to try to stick to certain times but occaisionally I should be able to look something up or just get on when I feel like it with out having feel bad like I am doing something so terribly wrong. basically I am going to continue to avoid the use of it when he or the kids are home/awake. I need to make sure I dont get on when he is home because then he feels I am choosing others over him, which is how I think he feels when he trys to call me and cant get through. He has decided I am addicted so I see it as kind of a trigger for him, when I fail at controlling my "addiction" he is angry because he gets angry with himself regarding his addiction. what do you think? Because when he gets yelling at me about it sure sounds just like he is talking about himself and the alcoholism.
" For us whenever we are doing just about anything together we are happy." same with us!
You know what though, I like that great friendship feeling of just having fun and being happy together whatever were doing together. I dont think you need to have that intense passion for each other all the time. Its nice once in a while to feel that and really thats something I miss, and I dont know if that is something to expect to come back. But I think it only does happen when you completely share your true inner essence of who you are with one another.
Sue
[This message has been edited by Sue (edited 12-10-1999).]
