JW: seems like my H really wants out and has told his cousin it is time for me to file. This is not what I want and I will not do it. Backing off and DBing is hard. Am trying to find a SBT therapist. Think I have a lead for one 90 miles away and I would drive it, believe me. Actually, someone on the board is helping me find the person. I am away and will be home tomorrow but only over night and then it is off again. Can't stand being home. Knowing H might have OW although he swears no...but I think to men an OW must be sex and to women it can be emotional. I am trying to find even a glimmer of hope....but even that is difficult. I guess if he files that would mean absolutely no hope. I think it is time we confront eachother and discuss 'what went wrong'although i know i may never find out. he never wants to discuss the relationship and either hangs up or walks out or says, i will not discuss this. i want to discuss it with a therapist. i also told him (and i took it from the board) that i will not give up until we legitimately try and i can see all solutions fail....but even that is not going to help. H is adamant....
Hope you had a great holiday. you are one lucky person...actually, it is your H who is the lucky one.
I look forward to your postings, advice etc. i only wish i could be the one whose marriage is working.
