Our first joint session with the MC was last Friday. We had both met her seperately and are both comfortable with her. She is very Pro-Marriage and seems solution orientated.
I thought the session went well. Eventually we got to what I believe is a core issue with my W...
Bridging the trust that she had lost in me for not "being there for her" when she went through a depression 6 years ago. We did not dwell on that issue to deeply. The MC asked how I might know if that loss of trust had been bridged. I said that T***** would show me more affection. She asked on a scale of 1 to 10 how much affection that she showed me now I said about a 2. My W agreed with this.
She then asked my W about me.. She said 7.
The session was quite emotional and I could see my W was nervous and maybe a little scared.
The MC gave us some worksheets on affection to go through until our next session in Jan.
Sue,
Thanks for your support over these last several months.
Chelsea,
I am excited to here on your plans,
GG,
Thanks for your post, I certainly understand what you saying about the lack of clarity and focus sometimes in newcomers. I have come to this BB for one purpose. To find the tools and the understanding on how to improve my marriage. Having found some of these tools and recieving so much support I now want to put as much back as I have taken.
We (W and I) have talked about retrouvaille but I would like to persue the MC route first, as long as we both think that we are making progress. Have fun in Vegas.
JW,
I was fortunate that the EA or ? that my W had did not create much more damage than the neglect that I had committed over the last several years. I believe that our 4 month seperation was my wake up call. The tough part of course is turning of that buzzer .
Chris
[This message has been edited by ChrisJ (edited 12-13-1999).]
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