I would like to add to what OT has posted about this. I know for a fact that OP's are not evil because on of my best friends, who I turned to for advice in the beginning of all this, turned out to be an OP around the same time as my sitch started (and no, he is NOT my W's OP). We had talked a few times about my sitch and he gave me some GREAT advice. Then, a couple convos into it, he said he had to tell me something that may make me not want to talk to him about this anymore. He confessed that he had been seeing a married woman with 2 kids and that she was going to leave her H for him. I was shocked because this guy is one of the most likable, moral, great human beings to walk the earth. I don't think he has an enemy in the world. I quickly figured out that my idea of the "evil OP" was clearly off, at least in this case because this WAS the same great guy I knew but he was just in a situation that was less than ideal. I didn't hate him for it and more than that HE didn't think he was evil. I think we all think of these people as slobering, nasty monsters, bent on following their evil plans to ruin our lives. My friend made me see that image as false.
So, contrary to not wanting to talk to him anymore, I wanted to talk to him more because he could offer insight to the "other side". He did, and it really helped me understand that the "other side" is as full of good and evil as "our side" is. In the end, his sitch is completely different than mine because the LBS in his case seems to not give a damn about his W and was threatening D anyway, or at least that's the story I get.
Anyway, my point is that just as WAS are not evil, some/many OP's may just be people who allow themselves, or choose to be in situations that THEY feel justified being in, for love or some other reason.
