I've been reading over your last couple of posts from you last thread...and here's my opinion, FWIW...
Quote: I have tried short of throwing her down and jumping on her, and as I said, if that's what she wants, sorry, that's not me, or at least not the me she get the first time after 6 months. Maybe we can get there together but I am just not the man that does that without SOME freaking indication that she wants that.
there's times I would kill for this....no talk, nothing - just do it!!!! Something about the savage caveman not being able to control his lust for me....somehow, that's a turn-on.
IMO, you've got a great fear of her rejection. I mean, she just came out of A with OM....even if you don't want to admit, I'm sure it's there festering in the back of your mind. Because you know she was with OP, maybe now your subconscious is saying "if she really loves me, if she really wants to work on our M, she WILL initiate".
Is this is a "test" you're setting up for her? If it is - do away with it. I think the two of you are at the point where you can pursue her. She wants those "in love" feelings....do whatever you can to make them come back to her. What's her LL's? Do them. If you don't have time right now - I think I read this somewhere in your thread - pre-plan a date. Pick a Saturday night, set up babysitting for the kids overnight. Go to a restaurant that was your favorite as a couple - doesn't matter if it was McD's or Shells (my FL fave!!) or wherever....or try somewhere new you've both been wanting to go to.
Go to one of those stupid tourist attractions you Floridians avoid like the plague - go bowling - stop at dive bar, have a few drinks, get a little tipsy and go play mini-golf. Do something silly....and completely non-pressuring.
My point - start at the beginning. When you first started dating, I'm sure you just didn't jump into bed. You dated, you let the excitement build. There ARE ways to do this, GH. Get the "in love" feelings back. You just have to find them. Whatever it takes to make your W look at you differently.
Put the ML issues - the intimacy issues - to the side FOR NOW. You know there's issues - as long as they are dealt with in the future - it's not avoiding them. Rather I think it makes you more in tune with getting them resolved.
Once the two of start getting comfortable with each other, those issues can be dealt with. When you start to get to that better place where, you can tell her just how her lack of initiation bothers you. I don't think that time is now.
Since you said you were very busy with work, pre-planning dates could be used to your benefit.
Or, you could just come home one night with a club in your hand, throw her over your shoulder and get busy!
