MsBean, Thank you so much for your kind feedback. I really do appreciate it and I'm delighted that so much of it rang true for you. I wish your husband weren't so bitter and that he was as open-minded as you. You sound like an incredible person dealing with lots of challenges.
As far as getting your husband to watch the tapes- you can try. Here's how to do it. Tell him that you watched them and found them helpful in explaining why things have been so tough for the two of you. Tell him that I have a no-nonsense approach to relationships that men seem to like a lot- (no touchy-feely stuff) I give people lots of ideas about things they can do differently to feel better about themselves and each other. You can also say that it might not work for your marriage, but you thought he might get something out of it anyway. (By the way, of course I believe it can help your marriage, I just don't want you to sound to optimistic or pushy.)
Then give him a tape. You can start from the beginning, or you can cue it up to the part you think he might really like or identify with.
However, keep in mind, the information you learned will be useful to you even if he never sees the tapes at all.
Hang in there and keep feeling better and better. Your kids will benefit from your strength. Michele
