IS MY MARRIAGE WORTH SAVING???

[hurtingagain]

Our cell bill was way over this month, so I couldn't resist checking H's recent calls. I saw that he is calling OW again. I figured he'd get back with her after I let him know we were over. I also saw my brother's X called him and had a lengthy conversation.

I'm trying to convince myself that I don't WANT to know what he's doing, but it's so hard not to check his cell phone. I previously would drive by his brother's house on my way home from work to see if he was there and have stopped that, but still comes to mind.

I know many on the BB have recommended to STOP. How do you
let it go????? I say I'm done with my M, but still feel this temptation to check on him. WHY? It's not that I want my M to be over, but feel he's shown me he'll always cheat.

He doesn't have email, so can only call him to communicate and I've been avoiding that for last 2 weeks except 1 call. I don't want to hear his voice, but know I can't NOT talk to him forever.