...his doing that action, and completely " forgetting" about our other plans, just sort of shuts me down. I begin to think that he really didn't want the Indian food…
First, how do you know he forgot? Very possibly he did not, but he is doing the exact same thing you are – assuming! Maybe he is thinking you really didn’t want the Indian food because you never brought it up again.
I think this is such an easy thing to overcome, at least for this food example. Just talk more. You are both scared to take a stand and lead so you have two people following each other and you are like a ship without a rudder. Set some rules, not as strict practice, but to define whose turn it is to lead. Just for argument sake, say one week you decide what will be done for dinner or going out. Write it down if you have to. The next week let him do so.
I’m sure others here will have better ideas than I. But I am seeing nothing more than timidity to communicate. Am I missing something?
