I think I get it now. Maybe your H is really more Type 3 than Type 7 or 9. You know those ED med commercials where they show the happy, prosperous, in-love looking middle-aged couples having moments that are "right" for sex. Maybe you feel like your H wants you guys to superficially resemble one of those couples without any sort of depth of feeling behind the interaction?
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
