Quote: I suspect that getting over this is a bit easier for the HDW, simply because we get validation of our sexiness on a daily basis. So it was easier for me to say, Hey I'm pretty good all on my own, despite what H does or doesn't do. The attention from other men fanned that flame and helped me to ingrain this thought into my personality. But, ultimately, it was a matter of relying on my own opinion of myself and not someone else's.
This need to internalize my belief that I am sexy was very important to me because I kept having the thought "He used to reject me because I was too fat. What's to stop him from rejecting me when I get old and wrinkly?". The obvious answer was my ability to believe that I was still sexy even though I was old and wrinkly.
CeMar, I am kind of joking when I suggest this but if you want to compartmentalize your desire for other-validation for being sexy outside of your marriage all you gotta do is post a picture of your manly biceps on this thread and all the ladies will validate the heck out of you.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
