You musn't berate yourself for your thoughts or feelings, no matter how "despicable" they might be. In fact, those thoughts only become despicable if they are put into action. We cannot really control those often random electrical firings we call thoughts, nor can we easily control our feelings. Remember, there is no right or wrong way to feel, there only IS the way you feel. What is right or wrong is how you choose to act on that feeling. You are a good person. Despite what the puritanical element in our society things, you do not become bad by having "impure thoughts."
I am dealing with the exact same situation as you, to a lesser degree. The W automatically assumes that traveling is fraught with difficulty and lots of things that can go wrong. The only thing I can say is just drop it. It is an issue you can do nothing about. His life outlook is out of your control, like the weather. Instead, think of ways you can plan around it, like you would a rainstorm. I know it is hard, but try to let his pissing and moaning roll off you. Eventually he is bound to see that his b!tching is getting him nowhere. If you want to say something, just acknowledge his POV (without agreeing with it).
About the HD->LD thing. Never let anyone else determine who you are. Period.
Chromo
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
