I agree that the group that has wandered into this forum is exceptionally bright and articulate. There's a lot of smarts here!
You've raised a subtle but interesting point (and maybe you and cobra have already touched on this): when you change, it causes YOU anxiety. It's not just that we have a hard time getting our partners to do something different-- it also raises all of our fears of abandonment, being demanding (that's my personal demon), thinking we're full of ourselves, etc.
You wrote
Quote: I am trying to give the message, I am still here, I have finally heard you and trying to give you that without saying it or looking like I am reacting in a manner to gain her favor.
I think you can actually make this statement: "I'm still here for you and I hear you." Then however she replies to that, just agree or do whatever you need to do to avoid an argument. Or just say it when you're on your way out or something.
Do you see how you're dancing around her? Watching her every move so you can decide what your next move should be? I am the world's best at this! And it is a hard habit to break. I still have the convos in my head about my bf's behavior-- he pushes more of my hot buttons than anyone else ever has. Now I try to keep the convos just inside my own head and don't get into it with him. Most of this stuff doesn't matter enough to argue about-- but the feeling that you want to argue or might get into a fight over it tells YOU where your wounds and tender spots are.
Quote: Here is my fear, at the end of the 3 weeks of her busy time it will be over.
You mean at the end of three weeks, she might walk out? If she really decides to walk out, there isn't a whole lot you can do. There was a poster "csw" on here who successfully brought his W back. Unfortunately her staying or going may not have a whole lot to do with your behavior. In any case, all you can do is be you. Not to make light of it, but you have to face that possibility that she may leave and you may not be able to change her mind.
