Sound like we're ALL in the same place. So, I don't think it's that we're impatient so much as scared that realizing our part in all of this might have caused us to lose what is dear. Gaining this compassion has been a painful thing as well, b/c you're facing all the mistakes.
I'm starting to see that I can't think of my pain without thinking of H's. I can't think of a way he makes me feel, without realizing that in our M, there was a point he felt the same way.
While it's great to go through this phase and get the positive outlook to be stronger, better and do it right, it's also sad, and overwhelming. How can we fix all the pain we BOTH caused?
But, only time will tell. Until then, do your best. Don't get bogged down by what H is doing, think of his pain too, and focus on YOU. Be strong, confident and better. Make these changes for YOU. You do have the power to love unconditionally, it's just that it's painful at times.
I assure you, things will turn around...slowly..think of how far we've all come already.
