Glad to be of service Mama. Well, as OT says, it's NOT ok for them to be managing these people's emotions but I never suggested that it need be a permanent situation. Your H's sitch is similar to a lot of people's in that he works with OW. I know a lot of books and "experts" say that extreme measures need to be taken to ensure NO contact, like moving to another state, getting a different job, etc. I think those things CAN be useful but not when the cheater is still not 100% committed to the M again. Once he is, then I think it's more likely he will see the error in trying to keep this woman happy while he goes back to you. You also have the chance that what happened in my case will happen in yours; the OP turns psycho and totally turns H off. I don't think this is a good reason in the beginning for them to come back to us, but since your H is already making the in-roads, then a little push from a crazy woman may help a bit. Anyway, like I said, there are grey areas and it's up to you to either accept and DB through it or set a boundary and enforce it. Make your choice, as you have, and then just accept the outcome. I think you'll be fine.
