Wow, Chrissy... that is really heavy duty... please do be careful.
I wish you had waited until you HAVE an apartment to tell him. I feel like once you've told him you're leaving, the longer you hang around there the madder he's gonna get, and he may feel he has nothing to lose.
ARE you looking for an apartment? Do you have a deadline in mind-- a week, a month-- when you plan to be out?
Keep your cell phone with you at all times. You might consider having a girlfriend check in with you at pre-designated times and have a code to let her know if you need her to come over. I'm not kidding, Chrissy. And you better check in here on the board at least once over the weekend and first thing Monday morning...
Weekends are like pressure cookers when things are bad... you're there with each other... things can heat up.
Right now your safety is more of a priority than worrying about being fair to him.
You've come a long way, baby...
P.S. Balto is right... if you need money to put down a deposit or something, I'll bet we on the board could come up with a few bucks.
Yes I am truely looking for a apartement. Actually there is some low income ones taking apps and I was thinking about applying even though I hate the thought of what kind of riff raff might live there. We have some a few blocks from us and ohh the drugs the cops are always there.
My dead line is mid June if nothing seems to be working out for me by then I may just go up home for the summer. But that is not my first choice just a back up.
I did tell H that I had the idea that if I got a small apartment he could stay there on the days he works and I would stay here at the house with the kids. Then when he is off I would stay there and he could stay her with the kids. Rotating parents instead of kids until everyone adjust. Don't know if it would work just a thought. I also mentioned the controlled seperation so H would not get the idea that this is about someone else. Which I am sure will come into play reguardless. Even though I am home all the time he will imagine up something.
I really think that once the intial shock of this is over. That this could be a good thing that being on my own for a while will force me out of my depression state. Not having to do for my self allows me to remain inactive which adds to the depression.
And heck who knows maybe after I pull myself together we can pull ourselfs together. Or maybe by then he will say uhh no thanks my life is better off now.
I am trying to stay positive so fear of the unknown and whats to comes does not overwhelm me.
Oh lol I don't have a Cell phone I am almost always home no need for a extra bill.
I'd sure like to hear from Chrissy today... this is how she left it on Friday
Quote: I finally broke down and told the H I was looking for a apartment. I explained to him again that I was done having sex for just the pure physical release of it. That there is so many different things missing in our relationship that there is no emotional connection for me....
Well H did not react. I am sure he is reeling right now. And all hell will break lose after he has a chance to think about things.....
No hell no nothing seems to be my H is choosing to act as if I said nothing. Guess he just thought it was the wind blowing or something. Oh well I at least purged my guilt that I have been feeling if nothing else lol.
I was thinking about you as I was driving to and from NC this weekend to pick my daughter up from school. Six hours on Saturday, six hours on Sunday. Loads of fun.
Gone the carvings and those who left their mark. Gone the kings and queens, now only the rats hold sway.
No not yet. Still looking for one I can afford in a decent area.
Balto my next move. To find a apartment and to find a better job. I am going to pick up more hours at the one I am at for now but truth be told even that is not gonna get me far at $7.00 a hour.
Why did you have to come to NC for your daughter. She goes to School here? Great state I love it here been here for 16 years now best place I have ever lived. Though true southern people still can tell I am from up north with the way I talk.
I spent a large portion of my life on 85 this weekend. She is majoring in education. She was going to do psychology but she can't deny the teaching genes. Judy and both of her sisters are teachers.
Gone the carvings and those who left their mark. Gone the kings and queens, now only the rats hold sway.
