I finally broke down and told the H I was looking for a apartment. I explained to him again that I was done having sex for just the pure physical release of it. That there is so many different things missing in our relationship that there is no emotional connection for me.And that I was tired of feeling like I am being unfair to him. Yes this was promped by another eposide of me having to turn him down. And just feeling shitty about rejecting him all the time because of it.
Well H did not react. I am sure he is reeling right now. And all hell will break lose after he has a chance to think about things. Sadly what little he did say indicated he thinks this is all about sex and me not wanting to have it so I am gonna leave.
I tell you I just feel terrible for him. Me I am okay I have actually felt better these last few days. Okay well I am neverous a little right now and feeling shitty about hurting him but in general I have been feeling better. Not as down. Still sleeping to much but trying to cut back on my sleeping meds at night and get into a better sleeping habit.
Anyhow I know I said I was not going to tell him ahead of time but I just felt like I was being so unfair to him. So I did now lets see how bad it gets lol.
