Well, it does look like he is having trouble adjusting to his new life, doesn't it. Who knows what it means, probably a combination of self-centeredness, guilt, regret, wish for connection, who knows. But anyway, like you and brue have expressed, I don't think you have to accept it if it hurts you.
The trick is "just" to say your feelings, without blame or interpretation of his acts (very tricky for me!) Something simple: I become very distressed when you call me, I feel like.... Please don't call me unless it is an emergency.
How is your house coming? As a fellow cluttered/perfectionist, I welcome a model of how to improve even a little in this part of my life!
