I understand what you mean. I would have liked to save my relationship with ex, but, it has to work both ways. Mine was verbally abusive. That had stopped within the past 8 months by my quietly telling him I would not tolerate it any longer. Anyway, it seems to me that he wanted to keep some contact but could not tell me why. He has been with ow for 15 months.
I can forgive him but I have to stop the contact. I have to move forward and be allowed to do that w/o any "more negative" to add to the mix. Our relationship was a mess and he has apologized to me and said 2 weeks ago by email that he understood that I didn't even have to talk to him. I think he was willing to admit his part in this. He says he can't get past some things and didn't want us to hang in limbo.
I hate to see him so confused, so I won't add any more by keeping contact. Would like to have been there for him but he wanted to continue the physical part of us. I wouldn't have had much self-respect for either of us doing that.
I believe he contacted you about his friend because you are the person he can talk to about the important things. The feelings, emotions, etc. He was connecting with someone that he knew would care. That was you.
I hope for the best in dealing with your situation. I believe it is okay to tell him how you feel. I just needed to learn to do with w/o so much frustration.
