New to Piecing

[COG]

brandnewday,

Did your wife ever have something negative happen to her sexually.

Well, the only thing she mentioned to me is that one of my elderly male relatives, sort of slipped her the tongue, on two different occasions. Yah, I know it's the gross stuff that make laughs at the movies but just is disgusting in real life. She did'nt want to tell me for a long time, but I'm glad she did. This was one of my relatives that she had a lot of respect for, until that happened. Now she can't stand to be around him and I don't blame her at all. In fact, I've told her I'd confront him about it if she wanted me to. The thing is he's an alchoholic and would'nt remember anything anyway, he was drunk both times it happened. On the goodbye kiss. FYI, I don't kiss people on the lips very often, I'm a hugger, or a peck on the cheek kind of guy. But she kisses people on the lips often. It's her way of greeting friends and family.

I just read recently that many woman who are "together" and have this need to have things in total order don't like sex because they feel that during an orgasm they may lose control. They can not allow themselves to reach this point because it is something they can not control.

Oh I think that may have some merit. She is definately a control freak, and admit's that she's never just let go during orgasm. I don't think she's really afraid of making herself vulnerable. I think to a certain extent she still holds some resentment. She resents the fact that I was'nt there for her for all those years, and now I just expect her to turn back on.

I am just throwing these things out there because the problem is about her not you. Something is going on in her head.

Oh I am very aware of that. I know I've got my head on straight and she's still stuck somewhere, letting her demons, negative thoughts, or bad memories rule her. Could also be that she's just not attracted to me. Whatever! I know a lot of other women that are.

God Bless,

COG