New to Piecing

[COG]

Spike,

I enjoyed reading your post. Wish I could have a story book ending, but my H is ready to move on and get rid of me. I can't convince him that I can change or anything. He just wants to end it. I've stopped contacting him at all and will see him October 16th for mediation. I wish my H would have wanted a separation...but he wants a D. What can I do but give it to him?? I have no choice. It's good to see other people's marriages have survivied.
Question: Did your W ever tell you "I'm not in love with you anymore?" and how did she say she got that back?? Thanks

I would ask my W how she felt, and her standard reply for about 3 years was "I love you but I'm not In Love with You". She actually screamed at me one time "I DON'T LOVE YOU". Even though we're actually reconciled, she's still a little squeemish about saying she's IL with me. It's a more mature love than the butterfly feeling. She never really got the "I'm In Love" part back. It's more of a forward feeling she has. We're both resolved that the "honeymoon" feeling has been gone for a lot of years and is NEVER coming back. And that's OK!

There's no convincing him that you'll change, you just have to do it unconditionally. Don't do it for him, do it for you. If the change is positive, it can't help but improve the sitch.

God Bless,

COG