I've already had the "it's nothing to do with you" speech, and the "my life is so screwed up" speech, and the "I've done everything wrong" speech from him. And he always cries on the phone, except when he's major PB. then he sounds chipper

FO, I've heard those same things from my H. Not sure about the crying; I have heard/seen him semi-cry twice but both times were because he was very upset about things w/ow not going well. I don't know how upset he finds himself when he's alone at his place.

BetterDays,
I'm really glad you shared this. I wish that someone could post and explain the differences between BP and MLC for you.
she would withdraw, very consistently, after a seemlingly nice time together. At first it was disturbing but I became used to it and assumed that she would withdraw after every meeting
I read more and more of this going on. I would take this SO personally when it would happen to me. After a great interaction, he'd not call for days or stop by and I would ask myself WHAT did I do wrong that drove him away again? You don't know the guilt I would feel over this; I made myself sick. I put so much pressure on myself to make sure that the next interaction, I wouldn't screw up, but sure enough he would pull away once more and I would be blaming myself.
I see now that this is just how it is for them. It's nothing I did or that any of us did. It's the cycle.



Most of us really marry only once. First love endures, even unto our dying day. And we never really divorce.