In general, to expand on what RB said, resist the urge to "know what's going on" with your W all the time. Your need to know this means you are too focused on her and what your changes may or may not be doing to her. At the time when you feel that urge to "know" creep into your thoughts, STOP and go a different direction.
Whatever IS happening with her is at least different, if not good and it is probably best left alone until SHE decides to share it with you.
Keep up the GAL and doing for you and leave her stuff up to her. You can't manage her feelings for her so allow her to be upset, happy, whatever and not have it be about you.
Like RB said, you do need to really pull back and just let things be for a bit.
