You mean to tell me that you are a healthy male who just doesn't want sex? Not buyin it!
I urge you to begin therapy to help you through your issues regarding sex. An asexual, to me, would have a "sex is just not for me" outlook. Your extreme negativity about sex belies your true feelings. In other words, methinks you protest too much.
Religion has nothing to do with whether one likes sex or not, so I'm not sure why that has any bearing on your feelings..?
I don't know, I just do not get the sense that you are being real with the people here, or with yourself. At any rate, I wish you luck in forging a path in your life that brings you peace.
I'm sorry honeypot..I'll respond to you in a second.
I'm just really cheesed off right now. Apparently some people think I should leave this board because I have found a little bit of happiness in my life. I am shocked at some peoples form of understanding.
Why would you ask me too create a thread to explain my situation and then ask me to leave when I find some little ray of light????
Just succintly stating that I can't really see any reason for you being here. This board is for married folk (plus those of us who have been in similar situations and can offer LOTS of help [nodding to BF, Stig, and Corri]) who want to improve their sex lives. You are divorced and don't want sex. Maybe DN has a point and you could offer a perspective on why some men seem to not want to have sex, but I think most of the H's of women on this board have R issues about sex, and are not asexual as you ascribe to be. Then again, maybe HP is right and you are just fooling yourself, and thus your presence will be helpful for insight as to how an apparently asexual male "finds" his sexuality. I certainly have learned a lot from this board.
Don't not take my post as wanting you to leave, I just think your time might be better spent elsewhere. But I could be wrong.
Cheers, Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
No, unmarried or divorced people can be here too, so long as the objective is learning or helping others to learn about how to improve their sexual relationships. Of course, I am not a moderator of this board, nor do I define its scope, so I can't or shouldn't force or even try to force someone off the board. I am not suggesting that you should leave, just wondering what benefit you could get out of being here. Yes, the people are friendly and very knowledgeable here, which is a good reason to stay. But maybe your time (which is a precious commodity) would be better spent getting support for your asexuality elsewhere. Not trying to be "clique-ish", just suggestion.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
your right. Gel does have the patience of a saint. pfff.
There are several people here who would be inteseted in some insights that you as a asexual male... could provide.
However so far I see a lot of contradictions and incongruence in your post. I see a very specific adeptness at a certain skill, that doesnt jive with the words you are using. I can think of 3 reasons for it.
2 of them are pretty negative, but 1 may be of great help to you. So being the trusting sort of guy that I am, I am interested to hear more about you specifically and your 'sitch'.
any of the following questions that you would care to answer, in addition to HP and Lils comments.
Just because you claim to not have any sexual abuse in your FOO (family of origin) doesn’t mean you don’t have some MAJOR issues to deal with, issues that appear to me to be very repressed. There are plenty of things that can cause someone to have sexual aversions, to become a religious crusader or other type of extremist. Can you give us some insight to your parents or other relatives significant in your childhood? Were they controlling, domineering, shaming, ultra religious, sort of like the mother in the movie “Carrie?”
Maybe you have a need to cover up some past hurt, so rather than address that, you turn to something which is indisputable – religion. It is all too easy to find believers and followers who will respect you because of the veracity of your beliefs. The more of a martyr you can make yourself, the more “pure” and free of sin you can rationalize yourself, the more you can convince yourself that you are closer to God and in essence, better than others. But in so doing, you have committed what I believe to be the greatest sin of all, and that is lying to yourself. Asexuality has nothing to do with this. It is only another symptom of your sickness (which if I my suspicions are correct), which is usually call narcissism. Don’t worry, we all have aspects of this. It is a big club.
You have a strong underlying anger, which you try to cover up with your “niceties.” It is good you are aware of this, but its influence still is evident in your comments. I sympathize with your FOO, I know it must have been very difficult for your mother and she surely did the best she could. But I doubt she, or anyone else, could do a “good” job in that type of situation. As Blackfoot asked you, where did you fall among the 8 kids? If you were older, I cannot see how you did not have to assume a lot of parenting duties. The is a lot from this that shapes who you are. So lets crack that exterior shell and take a peek inside, shall we?
