Sorry RB, I don't want a theological debate either, it just seemed like the way you went about this kinda conflicted with some of what I thought you believed in. It really has nothing to do with what particular religion you practice, though I see now why it does matter to you.
In any event, I still don't see this as the end of DB, or for that matter, the end of your marriage. You have simply just gone over to the other side. What do we tell each other as LBS's all the time? We say that we can't believe the WAS when they say it's over and they have no reason to work on the marriage.
You are now actually saying all the classic WAS things. "There is nothing to work on" "She is not the woman I married" "I don't want to work on the marriage" etc. If your W came here tomorrow, we would all tell her not to believe a word you are saying and to get to work on herself.
So, that brings me to my last point for the night. I guess what bothers me the most is that after all the posting and reading you have done here, you don't recognize that it IS possible that your W can change and sadly it may have to be this WAS-like wakeup call that spurs it, maybe too late.
I am NOT trying to talk you out of anything, merely trying to help you see the other side of this and actually, the irony in it.
I truly hope you find happiness, either with, or now without your W. I also hope that your W works out her issues and can find peace as well. Of course, I hope against hope that it is with you but I truly understand that is not something you are thinking about tonight.
