I think you are in an amazing inquiry and discovery of yourself, and I am thrilled for you. I think it is a beautiful and maturing and growing and exciting place to be, where you realize that you want your marriage and relationship at some point, but that you want to be healthy and generating health in your life as a standard.
I will be looking forward to reading about your visit with your mother. I see your separation from her over these past six years as really healthy differentiation for you. I am sure that some feelings will come up from your visit. But it also seems you are ready to face your past with new eyes.
I must admit that I am hopeful that my H will be sparked from some of his darker moments of his current journey, to seek his truth and discover himself at another level the way you are right now. It would be the awakening which the MLC he is experiencing could bring. My H has sexual abuse in his childhood, which brings its own kind of secret demons, and trust issues. It will be almost impossible for us to come together as a couple if he does not have this kind of dawning. Of course, I am open to that kind of miracle and I pray for both of us to grow in our understanding, our patience, and our commitment so that our marriage can continue. Meanwhile, you are an inspiration, and your wife is very fortunate that she has you, learning and growing, and also seeking a committed future together with her at some point that you are actively working towards.
I'll be looking for more of your road trip adventure to unfold. You are on an important personal journey. My thoughts are with you.
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
