What Happened with the Schnarch Movement???

[MJontheMend]

This is why the boundary concept eludes you. It is NOT about how you react. It is about how you feel about yourself.

I really don't think I am disagreeing with you. Perhaps, I am just trying to say that if you feel differently/better about yourself then you will react with different, better, less? emotion. I would say that I am FAR less reactive to my H than I was a couple years ago. For instance, if my H hung up on me while we were talking on the phone I would practically have to sedate myself in order to deal with it. Now I just think "Well I hope he gets over this brat fit sometime soon." and I am just mildly annoyed or even feel sorry for him. As a result, my H behaves in this manner far less frequently though I didn't change my behavior in order to change his behavior but rather as a result of my own improved self-esteem.