What Happened with the Schnarch Movement???

[heatherg]

Since so many here have not decided to give the medicine, but have also not decided to get out, I assume they are just trying to find a way to rationalize getting comfortable with their misery.

I know I can relate to this. It is very difficult to get to the mental place you need to be in order to 'give the medicine' and perhaps WAS's even prefer not to give the medicine, they just bolt instead. I know I am definitely guilty of rationalizing.

In my M, I would have actual desire just a few times a month and the rest of the time, I would only feel desire after arousal. I never really saw the need for change. I've seen the light only as a side note during the actual fallout of my M. But I guess I'd be classified as an LD who would like to make necessary changes to have a more loving, intimate R. There are many trust issues that need to be faced before this can happen. I'm assuming Schnarch addresses all this.

Something occured to me while I was re-reading this post. In general, what are the definitions of HD vs LD? I realize that will differ depending on opinion, but I'm just wondering what the general consensus is? I ask because even though I only actually desire H a few times a month, I'm not sure if that classifies me as LD or not because there are/were plenty of times when I'd rather just MB than be with H. So I guess that indicates desire, just not a desire for H? This is new territory for me and feels really odd to be discussing...