Sex starved wife who finally found out why

[DFE]

Dear Nicegal,

I honestly think alot of this started because at the beginning of our marriage he wasnt doing well in his career. I had a steady paying job and although he had a job it was a commission based job and he wasnt really making steady income. He also wasnt really working as hard as he is now. I would leave for work before him and return after him. He was just hanging out because the job wasnt that great. He would talk to me about it all the time. About how horrible he felt about it and that he wish he could contribute more. Maybe that was where it started. We were always financially okay. We actually do better than ok now. He has new job and makes great money as do I. Maybe too much money because nothing really makes him happy anymore. Everything was obtained too easily. We got lucky with some investments and things like that. We are young but do really well.

Maybe when he got this new job working with people that were big spenders and lived lavish lives it hit him how unhappy he was. He is a free spirit. The only thing that matters in his life is enjoying it. I hate to say it but he is selfish about it. He doesnt believe in working too hard at anything. Especially our relationship. It should either be there or not.

I feel I could have worked on anything with him to save our marriage because I dont believe in divorce. I just dont know how you make someone love you again. Anything but this I could have dealt with but he tells me he just doesnt see himself with me anymore and that he doesnt feel romantic about me. It hurts.

We went out on Sunday with some friends. He text me later and told me he had fun. I dont know if that is a good sign or any sign. I am so hopeful that my prayers will be answered. I have gotten to the point that I am real upset and dissapointed at him for leaving me at a time where I am ill and needed him the most but I dont want to throw my relationship away. I have put a lot of time and effort into it. There is no reason for us not be happy with each other. We are both good people, were once madly in love, we are still each others closest friends (although he isnt acting like one lately), we dont have financial problems. I am just baffled. I wish I knew he could get back his feelings for me.

The C wanted him to stay away for a month to miss me. I am afraid it would be Out of Sight Out of Mind. I guess that saying goes. If you love something set it free............