I know exactly how you feel - there was a long time when H wouldn't kiss me on my lips, even after our initial reconciliation (long story - he lied about being in love with me, yadda yadda). What I wouldn't have given to have had just a little peck on the lips - then.

I read somewhere that the one who has the most power in a R, is the one who cares the least. That's where I aspire to be. I want the R, but I don't want my H to ever have the power he had to hurt me again. Not that I want the power, per se, just peace that I will be okay, no matter what. The WAS's bring this upon themselves - what they do, only makes us better, because we know that we either sink or swim. And, I do love to swim. LOL

It sounds like you have done all you can do - worked on yourself, made the changes necessary, set personal goals, achieved them, etc. - now it's up to your H to wake up and smell the coffee. You sound strong, confident, happy with yourself - don't lose that, whatever you decide.

Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed.
D35,S/D twins28,D22
EA4/04 End? Who knows?
"Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim