I don't know how to approach my H about anything! I am trying to keep this R going but I think it's falling right back apart. We did soooooooo much better when we were just dating. I knew not to expect anything from him then. But now that we are back to married I want him to be here living with me . . . doing married things . . . . having this next baby with me. But I don't have any of that . . . and I don't know/think (if) he wants it. I'm so confused and alone and I just cry all the time. I know I've jumped around on here a lot . . but I sure could use some help guys. He has a couple of good friends down there that he is always going out with and doing things with (one of them is actually his brother . . who he spends the most time with . . skateboarding and just goofing off . . ) He goes to work everynight and every night the group of people he works with goes to a dinner and has dinner or coffee or whatever together. One of them is a 46 old women named Cheryl. . . . they get along well (I guess she's cool for her age and attractive for an older gal). and she's slept with guys his age (I.E. his best friend Zach). She'll give him rides home (as his car isn't out of the shop yet . . ) and I guess she asked him to help her move some furniture the other day. I don't know why but I don't like this relationship AT ALL. As a matter of fact I HATE IT. I try to get that across to him with out coming right out and saying it. . . he sort of picked up on it and I played it off because it pissed him off that I felt any kinda way about it.
With the other girls there's been in the past and all the lies he's told . . I don't know if I'll ever trust him again and I don't know if a R without trust can work. I don't think so . . and if I keep throwing it back in his face it definately won't work! I don't know what to do . . I just keep thinking about all the lies he's told and I never know what's the truth and what's a lie.
I feel like now that he got his chunk of the tax return and almost has his car back he's ready to break it off with me . . and go back to his "single" life. My parents just offered to buy us a house . . and rent to own it back to us. It's a long complicated situation . . if you want to know more just ask. It's his parents house . . that they haven't touched in about 7 years . . and it's really just a shell of a house. They don't want it anymore and were just going to let it go up for tax sale . .(long story shorten here). They're interested in selling it . . but have to check out the whole situation, and will get back to him (my H) about it. So now it's a waiting game.
I think my parents doing this is AMAZING . . I could have a place to live that I wouldn't have to worry about anything . . my kids would have a normal life. But I think it sealed the deal with him . . and made him realize he'd be coming to a stationary life . . married with kids. He hasn't wanted to talk to me for the past 3 or 4 days . . . and didn't even call me lastnight like he always does (his excuse . . he was running late). I don't know what to do or what to think . . I'm so sick of the rollercoaster . . if he's willing to commit to this R like he says he is . . shouldn't he working on getting his transfer pushed through? He told me it'd take 3 to 4 weeks . . alright we're there and then some and he hasn't even gone back in to Jan (the guy in charge of that stuff) to check and see what the status of it is. The more I would push on this the more he would back off . . i know it. So I try not to say anything . . but I want to scream at him, "I HAVE 12.6 WEEKS LEFT TO GO . . I NEED YOU NOW MORE THAN EVER. WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE WITH YOUR WIFE AND CHILDREN"
Can't someone please offer some sort of advice????
