This is my first post on the site. The short story is my wife wants a divorce. I think we can fix the marriage. My wife wanting a divorce came as a total shock to me. I knew we had issues I just didn't think they were that bad. She never told me until it came to this. I've got the Divorcy Remedy book. I'm trying to follow that advice now. If anyone wants to hear the rest of the story I will post it later. Just let me know. On to this post.....
I was really concerned about my wife holding all of her feelings inside. She doesn't want to talk to me about them. As far as she's concerned we are over. I encouraged her to talk to a friend or family member. She isn't willing to talk to a counselor right now. My problem is I don't like her choice of people she is talking to(I know I have no say in this). She is talking to her brother who cheated and divorced his first wife of 10 years or more. Plus has been divorced two times since then. Three divorces within ten or so years.
The other two girls she chose are former coworkers and friends of hers. I've only talked to them once or twice. I don't really know them. My wife tells these two girls the same things usually emailed or IM'ed between the three of them. There outlook on the situation is very differnet than the other. My problem with girl 1 is she is encouraging my wife to leaving me. Like I said the woman doesn't even know me. She calls me names in her emails to my wife and just really puts me down. I know she is my wifes friend but she also has to know there is two sides to the story before saying the things she said. Girl 2 I'm more comfortable with. She has talked more as a friend that will support her in HER decision. She doesn't push her to leave me or stay with me. My only problem with this girl is she is also divorced.
I just feel like she needs to talk to someone who is more pro marriage. I still feel like it will work between us but I would like the people she is talking to to try and encourage her to work it out. I don't think she is hearing that right now. I'm going back to a counselor by myself next week. I asked her to join me she said no. Is there any way to change who she's talking to at this point?
