Quote: it's unclear to me (and maybe to you and SO also) about why he isn't living at home.
Short version - I asked him to move out. He was flagrantly with OW and I couldn't take it anymore. Definitely anti-DB, I know.
And you're very right - he talks about his apartment like it's a "hotel room" closer to his work.
It has, however, done wonders for ME. I've been so different since he's moved out. I've let him go on many levels. I've stopped wondering what he's doing, who he's doing it with. I've stopped questioning, yelling, crying. It's allowed me to move forward - not very far, lol, but definitely some positive steps forward for ME.
We still have a lot of contact, I know. And as OT pointed out, not sure how good it is for the situation. I have been stepping back from that, as well. Distancing myself from him as well as trying harder to detach.
Quote: Where as if he was moved out because he has chosen not to have a relationship with you things would be much different and in some ways easier.
Right again - while he "chose" to move out, I more or less pushed it. He would have continued to live here, doing as he was doing - going out with OW and coming home and sleeping with me in our bedroom; acting like a family here - being someone else out there. Two separate lives, with two different women.
The way he moved out, it kind of left lots of things dangling - which isn't necessarily bad, just confusing all-around.
It still remains to be seen whether it will be beneficial to our R; although I know it was beneficial to ME and my frame of mind.
