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You sound great :-) My guess is that SO is trying to reassure you that he is not with OW without communicating that directly...


Not even gonna go there...I think at this stage of the game, it would be remiss of me to think so - I would think a wise oldtimer like you would tell me that!! I really have no idea. And, here's another "bizarre" thing...today he asked me if I wanted another dog (we had one, but had to get rid of it when things got crazy here, and with the addition of our 3rd baby - I just couldn't take care of everyone!)...anyway - he asks me this morning - WTH? My response - "you make the call on the dog". It's a fixed and housebroken chocolate lab...just what our cat will love! LOL
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Anyway, please pardon me while I vent a bit... After a very long absence, I've been around here too much watching people bang their heads against the wall and it is taking its toll on me.


OT, I personally think the fact that you even take the time to come back and help out and offer your wonderfully straightforward advice & input is awesome. However, you can't be everyone's savior. The decision to come here is yours alone....you're pregnant ... you have your own life.....marriage...and all that goes with it. And that's great, BTW!!!

I think there is a lack of "oldtimers" around here...or maybe because we aren't in "Piecing" or another forum - maybe we don't see them. It may be that once people get over the hurdle, get past the pain and start living their lives again (regardless of whether reconciled or divorced), they don't have the time to come back and post as much as they did at the beginning when their R was the only thing on their mind.

And there's just so many people here on the board. Where do you start? How much time do you spend? I know with myself, it's sometimes hard for me to post on my own thread, let alone others. Not because I don't want to, I just can't sometimes. So, I've picked a few that I follow, offering words when I can, just reading & following along when I can't (Hear that RB? LOL).
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I'm just fed up the last few days watching people chase their tails, or better, watching dogs chase cats thinking that's the secret of getting along with cats. In truth, it is exceedingly frustrating because some things become so obvious and it is painful watching people hurt themselves. And, I'm pretty impatient these days, probably thyroid stuff, so my tolerance is about shot for watching people shoot themselves in the foot and then proceed to shoot the other foot because they somehow think it won't damage them the second time.



We'll just blame it on the pregnancy!! LOL
But, once again, I think this goes back to no real guidance on the board. We're all here, doing what we're doing - not really knowing WTF to do or not to do! And then again, there's those people who are looking for "advice" only to never take it. They just keep doing what they THINK is supposed to be DBing and they're actually very far from doing so. I'm guilty of that myself. Twisting things around (to myself) to make it seem like I'm DBing, when it takes someone like you to point out that I'm really NOT doing it by the book. Then again....I think back to the time when I first found myself in this situation...jeez! I wonder if going thru all that "crazy" stuff helps to get to the point where you can DB effectively. You finally "hear" what you don't want to, know what I mean?

Anyway, I hope you stick around....but if you don't, it's perfectly understandable. We'll all miss you! But I don't think you're gonna be able to tear yourself away!! LOL At least not until your baby comes....then we'll be getting advice at all hours of the night!