Another vent session. (BTW, yesterday was good...I was with all 4 kids because we were taking a family portrait while she was working. We grabbed lunch after and hung out then I brought them back to her parents who were watching them....Also, got to see my neice and nephew which was a bonus...brought them donuts!!!)
My ex called me this morning to ask if we were supposed to play racquetball at the gym today. I told her no, that was on Wednesday. She said ok that is fine.
We talked about getting out Friday night and she told me that they still hadn't taken her off of her double shift even though someone supposedly took her hours. On top of that she said they were looking for people to work another restaurant for a fundraiser and now she feels guilty to not help out because everyone else took her hours and isn't available.
Besides that, it seems that there is alot of tension in her family. She wouldn't share with me what it was. So, I have to assume it isn't about me. Also, I told her that if she was free, that if her parents couldn't watch the kids, that I had a sitter. She told me, like I recall us dealing with during our marriage, that her parents would kill her if we had anyone else babysit instead of them. Her mom and a bit of her dad are very controlling and that is why my ex saw little things I did as controlling too. She feels the pressure and tells me that she and two of her close friends can't even find time to go out; because her mom says that if she needs a sitter, that she should be going to work. I offered one reply and told her: "I am not telling you what to do; but you know this will keep happening as long as you let your mom control things." (It's always been that way)
Well, I flat out asked her whether she still wanted find a way to go out. Her reply and not exactly a ringing endorsement: "I have to find a way to get out at some point regardless of who I go with!!!" But then she did say that she would work on it. I just don't understand. I just gave her the opportunity to tell me that we shouldn't go out; but then she never said Oh, I do want to go out with you
See all this working out and her doing that and meeting for drinks is fine; but will it ever go anywhere??? IS it her or is it her family???
I do try to detach; but as I say, there isn't alot for me to do or people to do it with. I put myself out there; but not alot of dates so far and I am not ugly!!! lol
Well, just not sure what to make of all of this. If she flat out said "I don't think us going out is a good idea", that would hurt; but it would be answered. If it is her family, then how does she overcome that??? I can't help her there???
Just lost on all of this and feel like I am becoming too attached to her and want of reconciling and it may never happen.
