I have been off this board for a while, but am (I guess) very surprised that your H is still clueing you on all of his feelings for monster. I think I mentioned in some of my postings to you (in the past) that there were an awful lot of similarities in our situations .. as far as how our H's were thinking .. I guess (in general) both of their attitude's.
My problem with your situation: I'm not understanding how (or why!) he is feeling like he can "tell" you so much!? I totally understand that he has no one else to talk to about this stuff .. but considering his being a counselor (am I remembering that correctly?) I am thinking that he has to know/understand what he must be doing to you by telling you all of this stuff ...????
Okay .. so he's going through MLC or whatever .. and he can't focus on how all of his education/training might apply to HIS life, we can give him that .. right? Do you think that you might be able to finally tell him that enough is enough? That he is hurting you too much by going on and on about all the "monster" stuff? Could you (maybe ask him what he might say to one of his woman clients if she came in and mentioned that her H was doing this to her? Don't you think that he would think that her H is a totally insensitive jerk? (Please don't think that is what I am calling your H. I am trying to come across that maybe your H would think that about another situation/individual .. )
I gave you heaps and heaps of credit Deb, for being able to sustain all of his "talk" and his very visible depressive moments because of monster. I keep thinking about how this is totally tearing you up inside .. which is very evident from your postings.
I don't know .. if talking to him .. trying to get him to see what he's doing to you from another perspective doesn't work .. maybe it's time to BIG TIME GAL? Maybe you can just come right out and say that you are having an absolutely awful time handling what he is "going through" right now and that until he figures out what he is doing .. you are just going to have "protect" yourself by not being so involved with this.
Is any of this making sense? Again .. considering what your H does .. he HAS to know that this is not healthy for you! I understand that he has all of his "stuff" to work through .. but can't he do it without "killing" you in the process?
I may be way off base here. I did not have to go through this type of thing .. so I don't have my own personal experience to pull from on this. I just keep thinking that it would be so terribly hard on me if had to endure (your H's very vocal feelings about monster)..on top of everything else that you (already!) have to work through ...?
