ok, weekend update:
We finally got the kids pretty much moved into their house, and theyve been there for 2 nights, there was an almost audible sigh of relief in our house. I believe it will help, but I'm not sure how much of H's current "stuff" is related to them being there. At one point he was complaining about them driving him nuts because they seem to be incapable of putting stuff back when they use it (this was caused by the 2 of us looking for 20 minutes for 1 of 3 pairs of tweezers that should have been in the master bath, never did find even one, and I finally bought another pair), and he commented that "maybe I'm ocd, but it just drives me nuts, I have to have stuff where it's supposed to be"...yes, I believe he is kinda OCD, always have, have just learned to live with it by staying out of his stuff and putting mutual stuff in it's assigned place.
Anyway, he commented what a relief it was to have them moved, that now we can get our house back...then something tiny came up, don't even recall what, and he got upset, saying "it's not over yet" in reference to the strain of having them live with us....I don't even remember what brought that on. At one point he was talking about how miserable he was/is, and said in tears "I don't know what's wrong with me"....he was really down and distraught. All this was on Saturday, by yesterday he was much more cheerful. I know he's concerned about work, as his "hours" are down (has to meet a quota)...so I'm sure that weighs heavily.

At one point in discussion, I commented that I just wanted to be able to enjoy our life together and have fun, and he said "I'm not able to have fun yet"....I have no clue what that means. He also commented "you've been very kind, I don't know what i'd have done without it and i sure appreciate it"...not sure what that means, either. Doesnt sound like something you'd tell your wife....

mentioned monster of course, that she acused him of being such a liar, that he'd said they'd be together...and then he shoots back to her that she's a liar also, that she never told him she was a wh--e. DUH to both of them, but anyway, I don't know if this is past or recent....probably much more recent than it should be. I did find out that he didnt send the request to her supervisor to go through the supervisor for client care issues, which I understood him to say he had...monster didnt want him to because it would make her look bad....so he didnt...duh again.
Oh, yeah, evidently he forwarded her personal ad to her with a note asking "how many more" when he found it last week....said he didnt hear back.

OBVIOUSLY he is so wrapped up in her emotionally still. The whole damn thing drives me nuts. I think he's nuts....I mean, what is it with him that he can't GET OVER IT ALREADY? WHY is it so important to him to feel that he was so special to her? Obviously, she's the one with a long history of guys on every corner... oh yeah, he even emailed her some quotes from "not just friends" about how early sexual involvement effects ability for later monogamouse relationships...I'm sure this was within the last couple of months.

He mentioned how monster used to call him every lunch hour to check up on him, I commented I should call him, and he said 'dont" emphatically, gave me this song and dance about now they have rules about no lunch hour phone calls. ????this did not please me, of course.

H was talking about how he thought God must have shown him monster's personal ad, that he prays that God will give him strength when he feels weak (which of course means he was ) and that whenever he prays that, it seems that with out fail God sends something to shore him up. Thank you God! but still, I can't help but wonder if he will EVER get through this.

OK, I just did get an email, starting with "Hi Sweetness", and with ILY's in it, talking about his schedule filling up surprisingly well, and a co-worker being upset about getting ringworm from her kitten. So, that helps me feel better.

H did comment this morning that he thinks we're "better than we ever have been"....I'd probably agree if he wasnt so easily upset and would go out and do some stuff.

I REALLY need ideas for fun ways to "change up" our life!
I'd even take outlines for flirty emails is how desparate I am....

I had to emails this am, none this afternoon, he did say this morning the secretary made calls and got 4 appointments set up...I havent checked the schedule.



I am just so frazzled, I almost wonder if I'd have been better off if I'd just thrown in the towel.

been around awhile!