The computer hasn't been centrally located here yet (Read; it's hooked up in sons room) so I don't get much of a chance to get on. And actually as of late, I've had a hard time knowing if I had anything worthwhile to share.
The evidentiary hearing is next week. Am I anxious about it? You bet. I'm tied down to a lease and to bills and utilities, and am uncertain what the court may decide to do. I just don't get why they don't work on a final settlement agreement instead of dinking around with this temporary one. I mean I know if H and his L can get it lowered, the chances of the final maintenance amount will be affected to..but I'm hoping the court will see through this, and not grant a greatly reduced amount.
In the meantime, I still have no furniture to speak of..and everything feels so up in the air as far as my 'life'. Will I be able to stay here? Will I be able to afford my health care? etc. etc. I'm so much trying to put these worries in Gods hands. But it's so hard not to try to figure out a 'plan B'. you know what I mean? I try not to let this overpower my emotions, but I'll be honest...I've been pretty down the last weeks.
H has Twinkie out all over the place...I don't know if he doesn't have any scruples, or if he's so far gone in MLC that he doesn't realize he's still married legally. How he can he be so public about what he's doing, and show himself in public like he's proud of it all? Not to mention what it feels like when I have people coming up telling me where all they see the two of them.
If there is a consolation, I have no heard anything complimentary about Twinkie. I've never seen her..yet...but the reports I hear are 'she's nothing to brag aout' "She's inches taller than him". "She nothing...just like there's nothing there". Soooooooo....I'm assuming H picked someone that will never question him , that gives him whatever he wants, that lets him play the victim in all of this...and someone that knows how to 'play' an older man wanting to feel/look young again. Recently they were seen at the local gym. Never in all our years of marriage did he/we belong to a gym. And never in all our years of marriage, did he..after work..have the energy to go to one.
Work has been hectic...the weather has been mostly rainy and dreary. That just adds to the depression I'm afraid.
Son23 is doing well at his new job. And son 28 is starting a new job on the 22nd. Their mothers day card to me was priceless. Perhaps you've seen it in the stores. The front said something like 'with all the things you did for me growing up, I wonder....(open the card) 'what did dad do?' yes, I smirked a little when I read it. Perhaps someday he will be a father to the boys again. Perhaps not. But I know I pray everyday that they will not follow in their fathers footsteps. That this generational curse will not follow them into their families and marriages. I pray that God will protect them and guide them through life so they never makes the deicisoins and choices their dad has made.
My best to all of you. I wish I could visit more often here. The computer is set up so stupid at the moment (no computer desk)...hopefully soon we'll get it located and situated so that its more comfortable to sit and use the keyboard.
Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible
Things will fall into place but I do understand that scattered, loose ends type of feeling.
Yeah, wouldn't it be nice if the sun came out once in a while? It doesn't seem to stop raining long enough to mow the lawn and of course the grass is growing like crazy.
I don't "get" the thing with WAH's having to take the floozy around. Most people that know anything about the sitch aren't impressed. I just think it's one of those bonehead things they do in "the fog."
Good to hear from you. I'm sad to hear that these early days are so unsettled and could kick your husband for his catting around in public with the "bandaid".
It would be so easy to tell you that things will all work out and I actually believe they will, but I understand how hard all of this is for you. It doesn't sound as though there's anything easy about it.
The only thing you can count on, as always, is that God is aware that you are doing the best you can and have remained faithful to Him. He will see you through.
Wish there was some way I could help. I am praying.
Hearing for Motion for reduced temp maint was this last Wed. What a joke. Both lawyers were severely chewed out by court commisioner for not having met deadlines of court orders from the LAST hearing.
Of course, Hs lawyer was his usually 'ahole' self. He made really nasty putdowns. Like about my job, and how I could be making more working ona line with better beneftis, and how he doubted I was even working fulltime. Also questioned my financial disclosure. So...next hearing is in July, have to bring as many receipts and proof that I can. Unfortunately, with the move i made in April, there is plenty that i haven't found, and I have used cash during some of this time as it was easier to deal with when there was such a time crunch.
Hs idea of a 'proposal', was to buy me out and waive any maintenance at all. Hmmmm. Big suprise. When my attorney said what he was asking Hs went ballistic. More times than not, the court commisioner had to 'shush' him up. My L is going to do something that I didn't think was going to be necessary. Not mentioning here yet..but if he does it, H will go ballistic. Big time. I'm not scared, but i also was hoping that things wouldn't have to go in this direction.
This next hearing will be in front of the judge himself, not the court comissioner. And our attorneys will be allowed to question us both. I am NOT looking forward to Hs attorney being able to do that to me. he is sooooo toxic and nasty. He tries his best to get a reaction by badmouthing .
I can't believe this has dragged on as long as it has. The court keeps wondering why this has taken so long. And now H attorney is saying the same thing. WTF???? H is the one that filed, not me. H is the one that hasn't done any of the legwork/paperwork, I have. H is the one that should have initiated every step of this, and pushed to have it finalized. I do know that one thing that H has been doing with all this prolonging, is changing his so called 'financial' situation. What a joke. I hope the court will be able to see through all these tactics.
So, LBSs...when the MLC bug hits, and the bomb is dropped, get legal advice right away, and get the financial stuff started. You don't have to do anything legal to push a divorce through...but don't trust your WAS not to be as devious and manipulative as most are. You will be shocked by what this 'alien' is capable of doing. I never, ever though my H would turn on me like this..and become this person that thinks that only he is entitled to what he wants, and to H with everything and everyone else.
I still pray everynight for him..but I also pray that God will be by my side through all of this..regardless of how it ends. I no longer see and easy end to this. if it dies..it will die a slow, painful death. True, God can raise the dead, but that's His choice and His job. It's one that I can only pray my sons and I can survive.
My love and support to all of you.
Women are angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly...on a broomstick. We are flexible
I agree with OnlyHope. Your husband and his lawyers are being terrible to you and this legal process sounds horrible. How unfair that you who did nothing wrong have to go through this.
God is still on your side although I know it must not seem that way. One day it will all even out.
It doesn't seem to stop raining long enough to mow the lawn and of course the grass is growing like crazy.