I'll Never Be Alone

[Creed]

Had to return call to H about dryer..but waited a day to do it. Once I told him what it has not been doing..there was a pause, and then he asked if I was going to be around. I told him no, that I was getting ready for work...why? He said he thought he could come over and we could talk about this monthly payment thing. In other words he wants me to agree to something financially, leaving the lawyers and court out of it. I told him that I hadn't really thought anymore about it, that he hasn't mentioned what he has in mind, and I wasn't going to be home anyway. The call ended with him sounding 'not happy'. I did NOT tell him that I have a meeting with my L tomorrow morning to discuss just this topic. None of his business at this point anyway.

Now, this will make the 2nd time in less than a week that he's tried to get me to sit down and discuss this just between the two of us. He makes it sound as though the amt I'm getting right now is not 'fair' to him. The court awarded it to me..and his wages are garnished to pay the amount.

I wonder if Twinkie loves him enough to help support their lifestyle.

I just read last night , here on the boards, of another WAH trying to get his spouse to sit down and come up with something fair..or/and to use the same attorney. It really bothers me that so many WAS believe that this is the right way to go. You need an attorney working for YOU..not one that supposedly will be watching out for BOTH of you. Let alone, it really isn't ethical for the L to do that. And I'd bet that every WAS that wants to 'sit' down with the person they've decided they don't want to be married to anymore, doesn't want to have to pay them a penny more than necessary. It's all in the MLC script , isn't it?

I guess I look at it like this....H and I couldn't work out/talk out our problems before...so why now when it comes to the financial end of it, does H think we can all of a sudden 'communicate' better?? He didn't want to work things out then so all of this could be avoided. Do I trust him enough now to believe what he might offer? No..sadly not.

Please, LBSs, be careful of the WAS sweet talking you when it comes to the financials. Look at this as a business transaction...nothing else. Leave your heart and emotions out of it. I don't know how my situation will end up, and I know how hard it is not to feel 'safe' dealing with someone you gave your heart to, and felt safe with. But now is not the time to believe that your S will deal with you fairly and honestly. They will be watching out for themselves..and themselves only(and of course, the OP). Let the court/attorney deal with the business side of it so that you're as well protected as possible.

Off my soapbox now...