Thanks for the good arse kicking, especially you, believing_isiah, seriously. That is of course, why I ranted all freakin' afternoon, so y'all would come tell me to get a grip.
I know you are all correct, I know that things have been good,or there is a lot of good going on, and the how is not as important as the rest of it...
My doubts and H's history of dishonesty come into play, I am so afraid of being blindsided again. I need to seriously live in the now, and live in each moment, and let go of OW crap. I'll be working on it. Continuously.
H did ask me if something was wrong today, I just told him I was tired from sitting in the sun (with the laptop on here all afternoon, unemployment would be so much more fun if I was not worrying about crap). He said AGAIN, he is where he wants to be, and he hopes I know that. So, we'll see where we roll.
Thank you again for whipping me, I was looking for it
