You are right, it is really too easy to fall into the groove of acting as if we are married and all is hunky dory...I need to continue to have a life independently of H, for my own protection should he pull any surprises, for my PMA REGARDLESS of what happens with my M, and also so he can see that I am not waiting around forever. It's funny, one time we were talking about OW, and I said it sounds like she is just waiting for him to ask her to move to be near him, that a 25 year old girl who "has so much going for her" yet chases after a married man who lives 300 miles away and whose relationship exists in a cell phone, sounds a little mental. Anyway, he said she'd never move just like that, she's too independent! Maybe my H is attracted to perceived independence...
Anyway, I got a little moody last night. H was working on a project on the computer, and I was flipping channels and chatting with him. It didn't matter if I was watching Animal Cops or an HBO movie or a dish soap commercial, everything made me think of love, what was missing in my love-life, and that as much as I feel the easing of the tension between me and H, our interactions are a lot more natural and genuine, sometimes I feel like I am settling. I am worried about getting to used to ignoring his OW relationship, I have always been really talented about turning the other cheek to things I don't like, rather than doing something about it....
