I think one should also try and give the impression that you are not willing to sit around and wait for him forever - without going into any R talks - getting a life helps. That you will be okay with or without him, and that there is a level where you will not allow your boundaries (of respect, caring, etc.) be crossed.
I hope your H wakes up to reality very soon, Leslie. It is so frustrating when you can see clearly, and they are off in La La land. One can live a double life for just so long, before it all comes crashing down. The OW will start making demands eventually, or you will tire of being in limbo, or whatever. The fact is, nothing stays static, and you must be prepared for whichever way thing may go. Which is what I like about DBing - we work on ourselves, so that we are strong, able, and sure of ourselves, with or without our S's, while they are floundering really.
You are doing an awesome job, and I hope and pray for a positive outcome for you and your M.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
