I have been quiet for a few days, but I am keeping an eye out on you. So, you're still deciding about this talk? Don't do it!!!
Quote: That said, what do we do now? Dunno. I am leaning towards taking Rob & Mama's advice and DBing STRONG to get past this urge to talk. I am thinking for ME anyway, this may be best. I don't know. I am still deciding.
I know I am a fine one to talk, I have been H free for 4 days, and I am feeling stong as a lioness. But I have two things to say to you:
1) When in doubt, DON'T
2) DON'T
You are an amazing DBer, and you have been hanging in there when I might have failed, for months. But now that I am on the outside, watching your sitch, I can see things Let your wife be. Let her BE. She will tell you when she is ready to talk. If you pursue her to seek reassurance, she will back track. I am sure. I know you said you think you might be able to ask her about the R in a neutral way with no expectations. Well, then why do it at all?
What if she senses that YOU NEED A NIGHT TO YOURSELF, and she was giving you the gift of an evening on your own (or at least without her), which you could plan for in advance. What will you do with this precious gift?
Thank her for giving you advance notice. Thank her for her consideration, the free time. Acknowledge her for whatever. And no frickin' questions.
OK, my two cents. You're the greatest. I always learn from you
Last edited by PositivelyListening; 04/07/0605:02 PM.
PositivelyListening ************************************** When one door of happiness closes, another one opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us. - Helen Keller
Let your wife be. Let her BE. She will tell you when she is ready to talk. If you pursue her to seek reassurance, she will back track. I am sure. I know you said you think you might be able to ask her about the R in a neutral way with no expectations. Well, then why do it at all?
