Sorry for the rambling. No, I never talked about it before because that marriage is over. This is the one that I am trying to save and I have always been faithful. But since in another lifetime I was a person involved in an affair I have started thinking.
1. I deserve this after what I did to the other man's wife. I wish I could apologize to her, but I choose to leave that in the past.
2. Because I contributed to my H's lack of self-esteem he choose to have an A with someone who makes him feel good about himself. That is exactly where I was at. If my ex-H would have given me what I needed I would never have considered looking elsewhere.
3. I have been trying to show my H how much he means to me by my actions. Words mean nothing to him right now. I have been trying to be more appreciative of even the little things he does. I compliment him more and I am trying to be a overall better person (someone he feels comfortable being around.)
I'm hoping that in time my H will see my changes and lower his walls long enough to give me another chance. It is those changes that I am working on now, that is all as there is absolutely nothing I can do about the OW.
