Well, I'm no expert, and there are definitely those on these boards who can explain this better than me, but here goes:
Detachment does not mean that you love your H any less. In fact, you may well love him more. What it means is that you decide that you can be happy without him. You GAL so that you can have sources of happiness in your life without him. You start satisfying your emotional needs in other ways, since they will not be met by him in the short term. You hope for him to end the A, but you do not expect it ... it may happen or it may not, but you'll be happy in either case.
All this is very hard to do, and I think you've done a lot of it already. I was only trying to put words to a process.
The LORD is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth." (Psalm 145:18)