Quote: I have to save me or there won't be anything to 'come back' to.
I agree 100%.
Besides, whenever you think you know what's going on in someone elses's head, you're almost sure to always be wrong. Especially when dealing with a MLC. I remember once, I sat at the kitchen table with my husband, he wasn't begging or pleading anymore, that had long since stopped. He just talked to me about what he wanted for us. Somehow he broke through all the BS in my head for a little while. I agreed to try to make it work, told him (and meant) that I wanted us to make it work. We had a lovely evening together, talked like we hadn't in ages, watched TV and laughed, made love. I LITERALLY just woke up the next morning and everything was different. I did not understand it and was very upset about it, but whatever he'd tapped into the night before, had found it's way closed again. I couldn't get the feeling back no matter how hard I tried. I was lost again and I couldn't even fake it. All the anger was back in spades. 7 days later he took his first drink in almost a year.
She can't help what's happening her and nothing but time will work it out. I believe that as sure as I am sitting here now typing this. She couldn't get free now if she tried.
So take care of yourself and the kids and pray she comes full circle and doesn't get stuck out there in the wilderness.
