Quote: >>> And, we've been going about once every 3 weeks lately. Either one of the kids asks or W 'really wants to go'. It's sort of 'comfort food'. <<<
AmyC: My guess is she is trying the new you on for size to see how you fit with the new HER & how you guys mesh as a family. The sentimentality of that restaurant alone suggests to me her "run" just might be coming to a close soon. I remember I'd have sooner chewed nails than to have gone anywhere that had ever meant something to my H and I.
Well, I don't know if I agree with the 'see how you fit' part. like I said it's sort of 'comfort food' when you are feeling bad and she was really down for some reason. She asked about going in the morning, so it was something she 'needed'.
I am sure the sentimentality is there still. We're recognized when we come in as a family and if anyone of us is missing it is noticed. And, we HAVE been going at least once a month since the bomb, even during the affair. So during the affair she was able to overlook the sentimental value of the place.
It's just odd that she asked early in the day. Like she really needed 'something' she gets from going there. I assume the food. And it is our FAMILY's favorite place to go AS A FAMILY.
I understand that you wouldn't have gone with your H anywhere. I think she originally went 'for the kids sake' during the affair, even though they were visibly uncomfortable the first couple times. Now everyone is fine.
Quote: >>> W seems exhausted and when she was telling me something she accidentally called me 'sweetie' <<<
AmyC: You would say it's an accident because she's been doing it for 20 years and so she just slipped. I would say she wouldn't slip if there was as much turmoil inside of her as there was just a few months ago...when she couldnt have slipped for all the anger and other junk she was dealing with. BUT NOW, a lot of that is being worked out and she is finding HERSELF again. And YOU are part of that. Calling you sweetie was not an accident, I don't think. No. She called you sweetie because you ARE a sweetie and she is coming to realize you are HER sweetie and that that might not be such a bad thing after all.
Well, I don't know about that. She slips up about once every couple weeks or so, usually when we are not blocking each other and are comfortable talking about something. Sometimes I do it too.
I do agree that when she was in her affair she never slipped up.
I'd like to believe you but I'm a skeptic. Then again, basic human nature would stop her from even spending time with me and being even slightly 'happy' if she wanted out out out. But remember, since the 'beginning' she has this vision of us being the best of friends and she DOES care about me. She just doesn't want to be 'married'. Needs to be 'on her own'.
This morning D10 did her usual "I'm sick, I don't want to go to school" routine. Every monday she does this and we 'debate' with her, tell her she isn't sick, tell her she has to go. Today I tried something different. I put on some dancing music and dragged her into the living room and jumped around with her like a maniac. Had to drag her a lot but she couldn't help but cheer up. Gave her some tummy rasberrys and tickles too. W came into the room and danced around too but kept her distance from me. She was having fun though and unfortunatly looked pretty sexy. A few moments of eye contact and smiles between us but nothing much.
She took D10 to school and hasn't come home. Probably out grocery shopping since we're out of everything.
So, I'm taking off to the office. Better to not be here so it doesn't look like I'm 'waiting' for something. I sure miss the 'intimacy' we had 3 weeks ago. Doing my best not to be needy.
